9.26.07

C.O.L.D. +

The fate of today's blog is sealed--it isn't happening. The fear is that the fate of Monday's blog (supposed to be Vegas Journal II) is in deeper jeopardy.

Shockingly--in five nights that probably equated to 20 hours of sleep, shaking approximately 150 hands, getting on four flights, and then sharing a house with 15 guys got me infected with the C.O.L.D. virus, and now Vegas is a 30/70 proposition.

More on this in a second...

More Fall TV...

I watched the DVR'd Big Bang last night.

Just a note: No chick is hot enough to carry a show this bad--particularly a show this bad with laugh-track. What is sad is that there have been good shows (Newsradio, The Nine, The Dana Carvey Show) that have been cancelled---and this show will make it because it is sandwiched between How I Met Your Mother and Two and a Half Men (which I've never seen, but is the top comedy on TV.) That just doesn't seem fair to me...

House was DVR'd last night, and Dirty, Sexy Money tonight--I'll keep you posted...

Despicable...

The fashion designer that bought Barry Bonds record-breaking baseball is giving it to the Hall of Fame with an asterisk (as opposed to an "asterix" as most people call it) on it.

1. Since when do fashion designers have a say over baseball?
2. Since when does the American public have a say over baseball?

Here's a scenario I want you all to think about:

Let's say there is a small church--we'll call it "Joe's Church"--with a small, committed congregation. The church recognizes Christian ideals, which includes a general, but not specific belief that people shouldn't have sex before they're married.

Several members of the congregation take heed to this belief--but the vast majority do not. Meanwhile, one of the members of Joe's church has built a remarkable political career, coasting from local offices to the House of Representatives to become one of the most influential members of the US Senate--we'll call him Steve. Steve is close with the pastor of the church and many of the elders of the church. Everyone in the church loves him and respects him--whether he believes in the sex-before-marriage stance or not (which he's never made clear.)

Years later, Joe's Church takes on a radical transformation because of Steve's popularity and success, and becomes a national, super-church. It has members in every major city in every state, and has 30 locations spread around the country. With this growth, the country takes on the belief of the church and begins to believe in the sex-before-marriage stance.

Now Steve, long-since married, and still an upstanding member of the founding parish of the church decides to run for President. He wins on the strength of his standing in the church and his unending support of his pastor--who is one of the most-influential opinions in the country.

However--after election, several reports come out that there is a chance that Steve had sex before he was married.

With that---despite all of the accusers and supporters of the accusers having not been members of the church at the time the supposed acts took place---and despite Steve winning the Presidency fairly---the general public is calling for him to be impeached on grounds of perjury...even if the "laws" he may be perjuring himself on are those of the church and not of the country.

Does this seem fair?



Okay--maybe it isn't a perfect example.

Maybe it isn't even close.

But you get the point: Baseball recognizes Barry Bonds as the all-time home run leader and recognizes that steroids--while undesirable--were a major part of the game for a very long time---and it is entirely inappropriate for non-baseball-people to attempt to punish someone for rules that didn't exist when he broke them.


Some Thoughts on Colds...

Let's say I've averaged 2.5 colds/year since I was born. That would put me at somewhere in the area of 65 colds--so I consider myself somewhat of an expert (as I'm sure you all do.)

Here are some generally accepted facts about the common cold/minor flu that I've determined to be untrue:

"Rest is Important": No--SLEEP is important. I genuinely believe that a lot of two-day colds are stretched to three and four-day colds because people just sit around all day, not allowing their body to rebuild strength and energy.
And additional to that--there are (by my count) only three ways to work bad things out of your body: poop, pee and sweat. This is why feeding yourself and getting a lot of fluids are important--but also why light exercise is important when you have a cold. Believe me--a little sweat goes a long way in ridding you of germs and building energy. (Of course you probably picked up the cold in the gym to begin with...so this may be bunk.)

The Ginger Ale parable: Why do people drink ginger ale when they're sick? That's like drinking gasoline when you're on fire. Don't dehydrate yourself any further, dummy.

"I've already had it" and/or "Oh--you got that cold that's been going around": Yeah--because there is only one strand of flu. Simple viruses never mutate. Ever.

"Theraflu is magic": No it isn't. It isn't the medicine in Theraflu that saves you--remember, there is no cure for the cold--it is the act of drinking hot fluid that saves you. It makes you sleepy, sweaty, and feels good on a sore throat. All of those things help you get over your illness.

"Get plenty of Vitamin C": This is the biggest BS of all. I took five packets of EmergenC yesterday--roughly 50,000 times my recommended daily allotment of this crap vitamin---and I'm worse-off than I was a day ago. If this is the best thing that science has come up with, I pity those of you who only get your recommended 100% every day---you'll have the plague any day now...


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