12.21.07

Merry Christmas.

In light of travel, family, and everything else---save my annual "I HATE NEW YEAR'S EVE" blog next Friday---this will be the last blog of the year. So be safe. Enjoy your family and relish the spirit of the season. Merry Christmas.

50 Things to Love about Christmas

1. Clark W. Griswald Jr.

2. Only time of the year it is okay to leave your socks out in the living room.

3. Celebrating a fat guy who invades people's homes.

4. Men wrapping presents.

5. The fact that I've been asking for video games for Christmas for 23 years.

6. The Poulan Weed-eater Bowl.

7. The fact that Roger Clemens family will be eating a free-range, non-injected turkey this year.

8. Decorating a house with big red balls.

9. Mistletoe--the Christian roofie.

10. Speaking out against Christmas Sweater Parties.

11. Families coming together pretending to like each other.

12. "DAD'S GONNA' KILL RALPHIE!"

13. My friend Dan taking the day off.

14. Black santa.

15. Christmas movies that don't recognize Rudolph.

16. Carol of the Bells.

17. ABC centering their programming around a suspected rapist.

18. The Christmas break where Jesse and I went on a 16-day bender where we had no less than 18 beers each day.

19. HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESUS!

20. Satsumas.

21. The ridiculous crap that we buy our dad every year.

22. Steve Martin's Wish.

23. Hop-a-long Boots.

24. Guys watching Love Actually.

25. Idiots who sign their Christmas card on their cat's behalf.

26. Kevin McCallister.

27. Thank you notes that are all exactly the same.

28. Mall Santas.

29. Linus' speech.

30. The Spears Family Christmas Special. (Yes, there was one a couple years ago.)

31. Drunk people at midnight Mass.

32. My brother wearing the robe he got when he was 9 down to open presents.

33. Jews decorating their houses blue and white.

34. Aaron Neville.

35. People spitting on environmentalists picketing at Rockefeller Center.

36. Pretending you aren't home when carolers come by.

37. Pretending to like the food at the office potluck.

38. The fact that Jesus was probably born in late summer.

39. Trying to read "A Christmas Carol" and imagining Scrooge to look like anything but a duck.

40. The amniotic-looking slime on the outside of a ham.

41. The fact that you've never actually finished a full-sized candy cane.

42. "MERRY CHRISTMAS YOU WONDERFUL OLD BUILDING AND LOAN YOU!"

43. Mr. Magoo's Christmas Special.

44. Celebrating a fat man who lives in isolation with his pack of elves.

45. Only a week away from people breaking their New Year's Resolutions.

46. People recognizing Kwanzaa as though it is an actual holiday.

47. Calendar stores.

48. "Yippee-kai-ay, mother f*****."

49. Erik's Christmas Party (and my attempt to recap it every year.)

50. THE GREATEST YOUTUBE CLIP OF ALL TIME!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Merry Christmas, every one.

mcflyblogs@gmail.com